Why College Football COMPLETELY, TOTALLY SUCKS. (Not Just U of L, But They’re The Gold Standard)

Mark Bacon—Main Event Sports DC

College football is a mind numbing pointless time sinker. All sports are competitions and a competition is meant to determine a fucking winner. In other words, you can point to a single person/team as triumphant over the rest.


Now, quickly answer the following questions:

Who won the NBA championship in 2010? The Dallas Mavericks.

Who was the best professional baseball team last year? The Houston Astros.

Who took it all last year in professional football? The Patriots.

Get my drift?

Now, which college football team is last year’s best? LSU? Miami Gators? the Dolphins? You don’t know? Fine. What is the name of the college championship game… its NFL Superbowl equivalent? Nacho Bowl? Fiesta Bowl? Doggie Bowl?? The BCS national championship?

What is this BCS? It’s the ranking system colleges use to see who is facing who. Basically, after college football teams complete their schedule, their record determines their ranking, which determines their opponent. Oh wait, but sometimes a team’s history affects their rankings. So leading to the BCS National Championship, is there a playoffs?

Well, the thing is the college system is weird in that…

All right. Stop. So, you’re telling me there isn’t even a way for colleges to battle each other and determine a winning team. Not only that but you can still lose based on your rankings? Can you imagine this working on the NFL regular season?

This whole BCS seems more complicated than it is and there’s no reason to concern myself as to why that is. Why should college football fans care about internal college politics? Do people ask “Why doesn’t this radio work?” No, they throw it out and look for an alternative.

If universities can’t set up a serious and competent system for college football teams to compete, what’s the point of following the games?

Well, you can root for your college. Yeah, school spirit!
College did what are you? … Oh, you’re a cheerleader? Swell…

You may ask “but why does that stop you from just watching games and enjoying college games?” College football, and sports in general, is a long story leading all teams to a bitter conflict and struggle to prove superiority. Each fan has a flicker of hope that this will be the year their team will best represent them and take it all the way. And only a decisive victory, or loss, will tie all the loose ends to this story. I don’t know about you but I like simplicity. What better way to determine a victor than with a playoffs forcing each college team to win to continue.

There are other reasons to dislike college football and not to watch, like horrendous college bands mostly, each conference has their own officials, three week hiatus in December when college football disappears…but the core complaint remains: There is no real form of competition going on in college football.

At this point, as far as I’m concerned, college football is nothing more than a football farm for the NFL. A poor one at that. How many more games this season…? Ugh.

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